Sex pills can't do it

But there's imagination...

A GOOD idea...

Go, pursue a dream
Odd though that may seem
Time here to live
Your energy give,
Life's new leases teem...

AFTER SHAVE
© Port Whitman Times 2005
D'ja ever notice - the guys in the after shave ads on TV-always apply the lotion with only one hand, gripping the lotion bottle in the other for all to see. Now men, gentle and otherwise, I ask you, how many of you use only one hand to put on aftershave? Huh? You may pour it with one hand, from the bottle into the other hand, but then you put the bottle down, rub your hands together, then use both hands on your face, right? That's the way man has done it from the dawn of shaving (invented, I think, by Judas Iscariot, the first biblical character I can remember who was portrayed unashamedly unbearded) and that's why those guys look so uncomfortable doing it singlehandedly on TV. It's some sort of macho gizmo I think, the hairy, muscle-rippled guy clenching the bottle as if he could crush it and maybe eat the broken glass, pouring a little of the precious stuff in as un-perfumish a manner as he can, so as not to look uh, feminine. Heaven knows, we don't want to look feminine! Uncomfortable is OK though. C'est la vie Amerique.

Henry Francisco PortWhitmanTimes

​​NEW CAMDEN TIMES

LIMERICKS...

Two entities working
Together fight lurking
Malefactors: The Brain
Plus The Mind, to gain
Upper-hand over troubles a-perking

U.S. Health Care: An issue
Whose benefits miss you;
If there isn't the cash
For avoiding a crash
It will early-dismiss you

All is fair game
If in talking, the aim
Is for minds to be frank
And not to have shrank
From topics aflame


Earth's teeming flowers
Grow to virtual towers
Seeming to a tiny ant
Delectably delicious plant-
Food it soon devours 

Spring ye flowers from the earth
Replacing winter's frigid dearth
Of warmth, and biting sting 
With beauty decorating spring…
– Ah the annual rebirth!

Naught but adventures, life
With peacefulness or strife,
Hardly matters whether
One is free or on a tether
With imagination rife


Take forever to die
'Fore you finally say "Bye-bye"
So you'll cease to exist,
But ever persist
In being immortal thereby

What good is honor
When you're a goner?
– Ranked more than life
Compensations a'rife
In the end a Heavenly spawner

Growing old, call friends
Comparing your ends
To eager beginnings
With energies thinning
Discussing what Heaven portends


Improbables rule
If sometimes cruel;
Where dreams abide
Let them be a guide
To ward off seeming a fool

Reality waits
While a dream creates
A fanciful scene
That could intervene
In what existence dictates

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